(December 2001)
Sgt. Anderson "So how'd you like the sailor boys? You decide to wear bell bottoms and swab the poop deck?"
I can't help but laugh at Sgt. Anderson. He already knows how to push my buttons.
I tell him what the Naval recruiter told me: In the Navy, I can go straight into the SEALs, but, it'll be 2 years before I can even apply to get into Army special forces. The only reason I am going into the Army is to fulfill my life-long dream of being in the special forces, so this is obviously quite a sticking point for me. If I am going to give up my job and sell my house and leave everything I have ever worked for in my life, essentially starting over again, I am only going to do it for the Special Forces.
He admits he's not sure how long it takes before one is eligible to apply for SF, but thinks the new 18x program lets you apply right away. The other recruiters in the office are unsure also, each giving answers varying from "immediately" to "two years, at least."
Nick "What is this? You're a recruiter and you don't know this information?"
Sgt. Anderson went from happy and playful to dead serious in about 2 seconds. His eyes hardened and his jaw clenched and flexed. I think I pissed him off.
Sgt. Anderson "Let me ask you something son: Are you ready to go through with this? I can get you directly into SF, but I want you to tell me it's worth my effort. Are you serious about this?"
Sgt. Anderson is unquestionably a hard man worthy of respect, but I'm not the coddled pussy that he thinks I am. I stare right back at him and confront his gaze.
Nick "Serious as a heart attack. You get me what I want, I'll sign up right fucking now."
Sgt. Anderson immediately picks up the phone and calls the SF Recruiting Station, located at Ft. Bragg, NC. The man who answers the phone apparently knows Sgt. Anderson, and they bullshit with each other for about five minutes before getting down to my case. Sgt. Anderson explains the situation, listens intently for about three minutes, and hands the phone to me.
Sgt. Anderson "Here you go. You'll want to hear this yourself...I just put you in the Army."
I take the phone and identify myself to speaker. He tells me that his name is Sgt. Conroy.
Sgt. Conroy "Son, let me explain to you how this works, and we'll see if it's what you are looking for. You'll do Basic Training, AIT (Advanced Individual Training, in my case, Infantry School) and Jump School at Ft. Benning. Then you'll be assigned to Ft. Bragg, where you'll go through Pre-Selection. That's where we basically make sure that you're physically fit and conform to the proper psychological profiles. That's about a month. Then you go through PLDC (Primary Leadership and Development Course) and get your stripes. Making it that far is not necessarily easy."
He paused for a few seconds. I wasn't sure if he was waiting for me to acknowledge him, or if he was trying to enhance the narrative effect. I was silent. I have learned that silence in the military is no vice. The saying, "Tis better to be silent and thought an idiot, than speak and remove all doubt" is very true. He isn't continuing, so I give him a "Yes, sir" and he goes on.
Sgt. Conroy "You'll get about a week leave, maybe less, before Selection starts. SFAS (Special Forces Assessment and Selection) is 24 days long. It is hard. You will be tested in every way possible. Chances are that you will fail. The vast majority of people do. The good thing is that you get two chances. If you pass, you get assigned a specialty, either weapons, medicine, explosives or communications, and then you go to the Q-Course, which ends with the Robin Sage exercise. You know what that is?"
Nick "Yes, sir." Robin Sage is the final training and evaluation exercise that one must go through in order to pass Q-School. It is a full scale exercise that takes place all over southeastern North Carolina, and involves many civilians.
Sgt. Conroy "You pass all that, you get your Green Beret. You are still in a probationary period, but you get the beret. Then you get assigned to an SF Group, you go to language school, learn a language or two, depending on which group you're assigned. If you make it this far, you get to go to SERE School. Do you know what that is?"
Nick "Yes, sir. Survival, Evasion, Resistance and Escape." SERE School is the school that all pilots, special operations personnel, and other sensitive personnel have to go through. It teaches you how to avoid capture by the enemy, how to help allies pick you up if you are in danger, and what to do if you are caught.
Sgt. Conroy "Good. You pass that, and then you're in for real. Start to finish, it can take from one and half to three years, depending on your SF specialty, which languages you have to learn, etc. That sound like what you're looking for?"
Nick "Yes sir. Absolutely."
Sgt. Conroy "Now son, since I'm not your recruiter, I'll be candid with you. Special Forces is no joke. The drop rate, from attending SFAS to the end of SERE School, is around 80%. And that's guys who have years of military experience. You will be going in with about 6-7 months of military experience, all of that being training. The military started this immediate entrance program a few weeks ago, and we are going to accept about 400 people to it this year. To be honest, we hope to get 20 SF guys from that pool."
Nick "I understand."
Sgt. Conroy "That's 5%."
Nick "Right."
Sgt. Conroy "Now, if you fail, it's not a huge deal, you'll be assigned to a normal unit, probably the 82nd, which is right here at Bragg. You can even apply to SF again in 2 years. But son, let me clear about this: There is little or no chance that you will make it through."
Nick "Sir, I completely understand. If it wasn't so hard, I wouldn't want it so bad. I don't want it any other way."
He laughed at my comment. The kind of under-your-breath sagely chuckle old people reserve for the young, eager and dumb.
Sgt. Conroy "OK. As long as you understand. Put Sergeant Anderson back on. And son--good luck. You'll need it."
Talk about putting a lump in your throat.
That was one of the moments of clarity in my life. Right there, at that instant in time, as I handed the phone back to Sgt. Anderson, I knew that I was absolutely resolved, with everything I had, to make it through to the end and earn my Green Beret.
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